sresisttls | Chapter 3 | Part 13: Attachment to Life and a Fear of Death

Translation under the cut.

Joker: Face Cetus… once again…

Joker: …...

Joker: …Whatever… It’s none of my business.

???: You sure do stick close to us for someone who doesn’t care.

Joker: !? Who’s there?

Lapomme: It’s too late for you to ask that, isn’t it?

Joker: …Oh, it’s you.

Lapomme: It’s not “you”, it’s Lapomme.
Joker: ...You’re annoying. Why are you here?

Lapomme: I’m just patrolling the area. What are you doing in a place like this?

Joker: …Nothing much.

Lapomme: You’re concerned about them, aren’t you?

Joker: …Ugh...

Lapomme: You wouldn’t be here if you weren’t. It’s the most logical explanation.

Joker: …Annoying…

Lapomme: Well, time to change the subject… What happened back then? Why didn’t you sound the whistle, leaving your companions to die?

Joker: …Straight to the point, aren’t you?

Lapomme: I’m the only one who’ll listen to your side of the story. There’s no need to be so defensive, isn’t it?

Joker: …What a pain.

Lapomme: Oh well, it doesn’t matter if you’d rather not talk about it. I’ll just head back where I came from.

Joker: …I was scared.

Lapomme: What?

Joker: I was terrified…

Joker: Back then… I…

Joker: I thought I’d be fine dying at any time…

Joker: I’ve always been a useless dimwit.

Joker: And I knew I’d die miserably, it was just a matter of when it’d happen.

Joker: I’ve always thought that way… and yet…

[CRASH]

Richie: ARGH!!

Orochi: Richie!? Hey, Richie!!

Niko: Fuck…

Orochi: Open your eyes, Richie!! Hey!! Are you really gonna die here!? You’re kidding me!

Niko: Get down, Orochi!! We can’t save Richie anymore!!

Niko: Plus, we gotta lure Cetus!! Or else Richie’s efforts will be in vain!!

Orochi: F-Fuck...!!

[CETUS’ CRY]

[STOMPING]

Orochi: Guh… It’s still standing! Is it still not done yet!?

Niko: Gotta push forward! Joker probably wants us to lure it to the very edge of the canyon! We gotta have faith in him!

Niko: Come here, you piece of shit!!

[SHOOTING SOUNDS]

Joker: Huff… huff… pant…

[CETUS’ CRY]

…If I whistle, that monster will come.

It’ll come here to kill me.

[CETUS’ CRY]

Niko: What’s holding you up, Joker!? JOKER!

Joker: …Uu… A-Aah…

From head to toe, my entire body had stopped moving. I couldn’t even move a fingertip.

I didn’t budge an inch, no matter how hard I wanted to move. No, actually, I might not even have thought about moving in the first place.

[CETUS’ CRY]

Niko: JOKEEEEER!! We’re at our limit! Quick! Hurry and whistle!!

Now that I’d come this far, having seen death with my own two eyes, I’d finally realized something...

…I wanted to live.

Joker: …S-Sorry… sorry… sorry… sorry… sorry…

[ENGINE SOUNDS]

Orochi: Vista!? It’s too early!! If you crash into it now―

[CRASH]

[CETUS’ CRY]

Orochi: Guh! It really is no use!

Niko: F-FUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!

[CETUS’ CRY]

Niko: Why...

Niko: What the fuck happened!? JOKEEEEER!!

Joker: I’m… sorry…

Lapomme: Hmm…

Joker: You get it now, don’t you?

Joker: I’m… a piece of trash.

Joker: I left my dear friends to be slaughtered… all because I was afraid of death and wanted to live.

Joker: Don’t bother with garbage like me anymore… please leave me alone…

Lapomme: …Got it.

Joker: …...

Lapomme: I never wanted to force things out of you. Do whatever you want, it doesn’t matter.

Lapomme: But are you alright with continuing on like this, even after you’d come to realise you had a will to live?

Joker: Huh…?

Lapomme: Even weak people have a place of their own. There has to be something only you can do.

Joker: …That doesn’t…

Lapomme: If you’ve made a mistake, you can fix it. You can start over again countless times, can’t you?

Lapomme: …That’s all I had to say.

Joker: Fix it…

Joker: Me, fixing my mistakes… nobody wants that.